Disconnecting to Reconnect

You ever need a social media break? I know I often do. I’ve stressed to you all before about how I am not a fan of it and most of the time I use it out of boredom or for my blog. Well, the other day I looked at my 2017 list and realized that I should be much further with my progress. Then I asked myself why I wasn’t completing these and felt like I was always rushing. Why was my mind all over the place? Why couldn’t I focus? Then I looked down at my phone and realized I was scrolling thru Facebook for the past hour; just liking and sharing random posts; not even really taking the time to look at them. I realized I was sharing articles I never even went back to read. I just looked at the headline and shared it. I was numbing my mind and I didn’t like it. So I decided to unplug. I deactivated my Facebook account, deleted Snapchat (which I later re-installed cause I needed to see what my husbands Michael B Jordan and Eric Bellinger was up to lol) and started to clear my head. I had so much on my mind and I couldn’t think straight and I was always filling up my time with empty entertainment. I needed..need to really focus.


I started with baby steps and didn’t get on Facebook while I was at home. That wasn’t too hard. Then I figured, if I cut out distractions at home, why can’t I do it at work and see how it works? And the results are awesome. I am exceeding in my daily goal at work and overall feeling more tuned in. I don’t have a bunch of random post flooding my mind when I should be focused on more important things. If I want to look at the news, I can always go to the website myself. If I want to read about the latest gossip with celebs, I can find websites for that too. And If I want to scroll Facebook, I can always activate it again and continue as I was.

Before I decided to deactivate it, I deleted a lot of people. I went from over 1,500 friends to almost 300 now. I started only adding people that had some sort of value. Whether they were fellow bloggers, entrepreneurs, inspirational speakers or just positive people who shared similar views. I started making connections with people more like myself and it is such a nice feeling. I got tired of seeing people share fight videos, or depressing murder/suicide videos, or just share way too much information. The beauty of Facebook and any type of social media is that we can choose to see what we want to. So, that’s exactly what I did.

” It was taking up so much of my time.. by doing nothing. “

Another thing that made me slow doing my media craze was how I felt after I used it for a prolonged amount of time. Some days, I  would lay on the couch forimages (2).jpg hours, scrolling Facebook and I began to become aware of the way it made me feel. I was often more tired, didn’t pay attention to the time and things I said I was going to do. I often had headaches from looking at my screen at work for eight hours only to get off and look at my cell phone screen. Looking for something to make me laugh or something interesting to read, on FACEBOOK. And that was a huge problem. It was taking up so much of my time by doing nothing. It is so easy to keep up habits because they are comfortable and the go-to thing to do when you get bored, but they can have detrimental effects. People can become addicted to the internet and not even know it. Now I know what you’re thinking, ‘Really Malissa? Addicted? Girl, it ain’t that serious’. Well I’m telling you, there is such a thing. Such symptoms are:

  • Anxiety– You may look at another persons life on social media and think, “Man I have to catch up! I should be doing this and that too!” Slow down. Everyone’s journey is different and trust me, you don’t know the full story.
  • Depression- Seeing other people ‘pass you’ in life may cause a feeling of hopelessness and that could lead to depression and you not even know it.
  • Isolation – You see other peoples lives and think, ‘My life isn’t as cool as such and such, why even bother’. And before you know it, you are in your room watching everyone else have all the fun through your cell phone.
  • No sense of time – (Guilty) I am soooo guilty of this. Just ten more minutes and I’ll start cooking. Before I know it, an hour and a half has passed and I’ve done nothing.
  • Euphoric feeling when you can access the Internet/Your phone – Do you check your phone every few minutes to see who may have text you? DM’d you? Liked the post you shared? Do you feel upset/sad when NONE of your notifications have gone off? This could be a sign! Validation through no communication. A simple like should not make or break your day.

Now, I am not criticizing those of you who love social media. It’s an awesome outlet, really. I just personally feel that it can be a huge distraction and stop you from focusing and really thinking about your next move.  It’s time consuming and a lot of times may cause more harm than good. So sometimes, unplug. Take a step back from going straight home and turning on the TV. Pick up a book and read. Take a walk in the park or around your neighborhood. Disconnect with all of the outside world and dig into getting to know yourself. Really enjoy the things you are doing. You don’t always have to pick up the phone to document every little thing you do and let others know. Sometimes, live in the moment. Leave your phone at home or in your pocket and LIVE.

I have this tattooed on my side. It’s a reminder to always take a step back and disconnect to reconnect with myself.

As Always, Peace & Love





5 Replies to “Disconnecting to Reconnect”

  1. You are so right! There are many studies that how the more time we spend on social media, the more depressed we get. I think its very important to take a break from it. I too have downsized my friends and following. My rule is, if you don’t post things that inspire me or are meaningful, we cant be friends on social media. I do not discriminate either lol. Majority of my family is not in my “social media circle” lol.

    1. Same here! I had to delete a few family members too cause I just wasn’t here for the mess lol And it definitely is necessary sometimes. It can be consuming and I can always feel when I need a break.

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